This is my brain on too little sleep
Believing that this killer whale acted alone is a fool’s errand. This is clearly a harbinger of future killer whale attacks. I demand that the Department of Homeland Security launch a Killer Whale Division immediately. These killer mammals of the theme park ocean must be brought to heed. Some analysts might argue that this is ...
Believing that this killer whale acted alone is a fool's errand. This is clearly a harbinger of future killer whale attacks. I demand that the Department of Homeland Security launch a Killer Whale Division immediately. These killer mammals of the theme park ocean must be brought to heed.
Some analysts might argue that this is simply a misunderstanding, and that better communication would help. This is national security naivite at its most extreme. Indeed, according to the Los Angeles Times, this whale "had been involved in two previous deaths, including one at the water park in 1999." I bet authorities are Mirandizing the whale as I type this.
Negotiating with killer whales will accomplish nothing -- after all, they are killer whales. We cannot rest unless we have put the largest mammals in the world in their proper place.
Believing that this killer whale acted alone is a fool’s errand. This is clearly a harbinger of future killer whale attacks. I demand that the Department of Homeland Security launch a Killer Whale Division immediately. These killer mammals of the theme park ocean must be brought to heed.
Some analysts might argue that this is simply a misunderstanding, and that better communication would help. This is national security naivite at its most extreme. Indeed, according to the Los Angeles Times, this whale "had been involved in two previous deaths, including one at the water park in 1999." I bet authorities are Mirandizing the whale as I type this.
Negotiating with killer whales will accomplish nothing — after all, they are killer whales. We cannot rest unless we have put the largest mammals in the world in their proper place.
Daniel W. Drezner is a professor of international politics at the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy at Tufts University, where he is the co-director of the Russia and Eurasia Program. Twitter: @dandrezner
More from Foreign Policy
How the Russian Oil Price Cap Will Work
Ignore the naysayers—the long-prepared plan is a smart way to slash the Kremlin’s profits.
‘They Are Pushing Everywhere’: Kyiv Goes on the Offensive
Ukraine may have achieved its biggest breakthrough of the war.
The Chinese Public Doesn’t Know What the Rules Are Anymore
Reckless policies have knocked out established norms.
The Last String of Russian Greatness Is About to Snap
A great classical music tradition might die because of the Ukraine invasion.
Sign up for Morning Brief
Foreign Policy’s flagship daily newsletter with what’s coming up around the world today from Foreign Policy’s newsletter writer Colm Quinn.
By signing up, I agree to the Privacy Policy and Terms of Use and to occasionally receive special offers from Foreign Policy.
