Daniel W. Drezner

Contest: predict the stunning conclusion to the DSK story

Contest:  predict the stunning conclusion to the DSK story

Your humble blogger has been relatively lazy circumspect in blogging about the Dominique Strauss-Kahn affair.  The latest turn of events, however, has rousted me from my vacation torpor to ask just one simple question:  are you friggin’ kidding me??!!!

Both the New York Times and New York Post carry stories containing more prosecutor leaks than the Titanic suggesting that the woman DSK allegedly attacked was "a con artist." according to one blind quote.  From the Times account:

Although forensic tests found unambiguous evidence of a sexual encounter between Mr. Strauss-Kahn, a French politician, and the woman, prosecutors now do not believe much of what the accuser has told them about the circumstances or about herself….

Among the discoveries, one of the officials said, are issues involving the asylum application of the 32-year-old housekeeper, who is Guinean, and possible links to people involved in criminal activities, including drug dealing and money laundering….

According to the two officials, the woman had a phone conversation with an incarcerated man within a day of her encounter with Mr. Strauss-Kahn in which she discussed the possible benefits of pursuing the charges against him. The conversation was recorded.

That man, the investigators learned, had been arrested on charges of possessing 400 pounds of marijuana. He is among a number of individuals who made multiple cash deposits, totaling around $100,000, into the woman’s bank account over the last two years. The deposits were made in Arizona, Georgia, New York and Pennsylvania.

The investigators also learned that she was paying hundreds of dollars every month in phone charges to five companies. The woman had insisted she had only one phone and said she knew nothing about the deposits except that they were made by a man she described as her fiancé and his friends.

Well, this is pretty simple — if the prosecutors are leaking this stuff, then the charges are going to be dropped.  Dominique Strauss-Kahn will be a free man, thereby re-convulsing the French political scene.  I’m also expecting a super-fun flurry of discussion about the dangers of immigration from  tis latest turn of events. 

The story can’t end here, however.  Readers are therefore warmly encouraged to suggest how Act III of l’affaire-DSK will play itself out in the comments section. 

Here’s my suggestion:  DSK and his wife Anne Sinclair will proft handsomely from a wrongful prosecution settlement with the city of New York.  After that, they decamp to the island of Tahiti.  At which point, Neve Campbell turns out not to be dead and, in league with Sinclair, eliminates DSK so they can enjoy their riches with the help of Bill Murray. 

[Implausible, I say!!–ed.  I say, not implausible enough!!!]