Daniel W. Drezner

I will not tolerate a… baby bump gap!!!!

You know, as 2013 dawns, there’s a brewing debate about whether America is now just a “mediocre” country.  As a long-run optimist about the America’s future, however, I’m pretty dubious of the mediocrity argument.  There are too many areas where the United States excels in to write the country off:  high tech, higher education, Hollywood, and ...

You know, as 2013 dawns, there’s a brewing debate about whether America is now just a “mediocre” country.  As a long-run optimist about the America’s future, however, I’m pretty dubious of the mediocrity argument.  There are too many areas where the United States excels in to write the country off:  high tech, higher education, Hollywood, and so forth. 

Of course, these strengths are meaningless in foreign policy terms unless the American government can wisely and adroitly deploy them when necessary.  Consider, for example, this story from Yonhap about whether Ri Sol-Ju, the first lady of North Korea, has had a baby

An apparent loss of weight by Ri Sol-ju, the wife of North Korean leader Kim Jong-un, fueled speculation in Seoul Thursday that she may have given birth.

A government source, who declined to be identified, said images on the Korean Central TV Broadcasting Station showed a slimmer Ri watching a live New Year’s performance with her husband and other high-ranking dignitaries.

He claimed local experts who saw the footage of the first lady speculated that, judging by the weight loss, she may have given birth recently.

This claim was based on the contrast between the latest images taken on New Year’s Day and those released in mid December. Pictures of Ri taken last month showed her face looking puffy and there was a noticeable swelling in her midsection.

Here’s the photos related to the story: 

See if you can locate Ri's baby bump

All I can say is, I hope that the salient U.S. intelligence agencies — the Central Intelligence Agency, National Security Administration, Defense Intelligence Agency, National Reconnaissance Office, and, of course, the Office of the Director of National Intelligence — bring in America’s leading experts on the “baby bump.”  And by leading experts, I’m talking about the analysts who populate stories in People, Us Weekly, Star Magazine, Perez Hilton, and the National Enquirer on celebrity baby bumps.  Because I will not stand idly by while one of America’s greatest strengths — our unparalleled advantage in celebrity tabloid journalism — stands on the sidelines when this pressing question about one of the biggest threats to stability in the Pacific Rim persists. 

[Really, isn’t the U.K. the unparalleled leader in tabloids?  I mean, they invented the term “baby bump”!–ed.  They’ve been weakened by internal scandals and distracted by Kate Middleton.  It’s America’s time to shine!!!!] 

 Twitter: @dandrezner

Trending Now Sponsored Links by Taboola

By Taboola

More from Foreign Policy

By Taboola