‘In My Head, He Was Already Dead’: Parents Describe Anguish of Children’s Flight to ISIS

A middle-aged woman looks at the camera and recounts how she felt two years ago when she received a text message from her 19-year-old son saying he was in Syria.

“When I read the message ‘Mom, I’m in Syria,’ I read, ‘Mom I’m dead,’” Saliha, whose last name is withheld, says in French. “Because in my head, he was already dead.”

The 90-second-clip, which tells the story of how her son left home to join the Islamic State, is one in a series of short videos released by the French government Wednesday to urge potential foreign fighters away from joining the Islamic State.

Posted on the French government’s web page, the clips are the latest in the French government’s campaign to dissuade young Europeans away from jihad. The program’s name translates to “Stop Jihadism.”

The campaign is intended to compete with propaganda the Islamic State disseminates online to encourage young fighters to move to Syria or carry so-called lone wolf attacks in their own country. The French clips are designed to persuade would-be jihadis to stay home by focusing on the fear and pain felt by the parents, children, spouses, and siblings left behind.

In a conversation with French RTL radio Wednesday, French Prime Minister Manuel Valls said there are 1,300 French citizens who have been or are currently affiliated with extremist groups.  Of those, 500 are currently in Syria and Iraq.

“In France itself, there are hundreds, thousands even, of young people who are at risk of radicalisation,” he said. “It’s a huge challenge and that is why we have mobilised families to get the message out.”

In Saliha’s clip, she recalls her husband receiving a call from their son’s phone number, thinking he would finally hear his child’s voice again. When he answered, a Syrian man said his son had been killed but died as a martyr. “When they give you news of your child’s death, they don’t give his real name but his battlefield name,” she says. “It’s as though you’re no longer the parent of that child.”

Toward the end of the 90-second clip, Saliha holds up a photo of her son and urges parents and community leaders to put measures in place that will stop young people from moving to Syria to join the Islamic State.

“Regardless of your origin, regardless of someone’s religion when they go, it could happen to anyone,” she says. The video then fades out and asks the listener to call a provided hotline number if they were personally affected by a story similar to Saliha’s.

That hotline was an earlier step taken by the French government to help prevent young French people from leaning toward extremism.

Other videos in the series released Wednesday include a brother telling the story of his younger sister’s secretive departure to Syria. She called him to reveal her plan, but wouldn’t listen to his advice. Instead she urged him to join her, saying “it’s paradise there.”

In a different clip, another mother, Véronique, whose last name is also not offered, explains how her son’s privileged background didn’t protect him from the lure of the Islamic State.

Her son who left France for Germany and never came back, ended up in Syria. “We don’t know exactly where he is or what he’s doing,” she says. “We can’t go get him and he can’t come back.”

“It’s very hard to talk about what we go through,” Véronique adds. “It’s seen negatively, it’s not well understood…we need help, because it’s a huge sorrow.”

France has been particularly sensitive to the lure of extremism since gunmen stormed the offices of satirical newspaper Charlie Hebdo in January, killing 12. By the end of that month, the French government had launched “Stop Djihadisme” and began producing videos to discourage youth involvement in extremist groups.

But the videos released Wednesday strike a different, more subtle tone than the initiative’s earlier campaign materials. Unlike one short film released in January, which mimics a teenager’s recruitment to the Islamic State, Wednesday’s videos are short and to the point.

Photo Credit: AP Photo